110+ Double Entendre Jokes

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July 24, 2025

Double Entendre Jokes

If you love clever wordplay, you’re in for a treat. Double entendre jokes twist meanings to make you laugh twice—once at the surface and again when you catch the hidden message. These jokes are perfect for breaking the ice or lightening the mood in any conversation. Whether you prefer witty, clean humor or a cheeky chuckle, this collection has something for everyone.

1. Funny Double Entendre Jokes 😆

Double Entendre Jokes twist words with a wink—clever, cheeky, and just risky enough to make you grin (and maybe blush). They say one thing, mean another, and keep you laughing in between.

  1. I told my friend I painted the ceiling—he said it looked upstanding.
  2. I wanted to fix my broken watch… but time healed all wounds.
  3. My gym instructor said I lift a ton—I said, “Only emotionally.”
  4. I tried to squeeze juice from a lemon—it gave me that extra zest in life.
  5. My barber asked if I wanted a trim—I said, “Just feather it, I like the breeze.”
  6. I toasted bread this morning—it was a real rye smile.
  7. I baked cookies—they found me irresistible.
  8. My fridge light’s on but no one’s home—guess it’s just chilling.
  9. I told mom I lost my shirt—she said I should start fresh.
  10. I started knitting—I’m hooked.
  11. I signed up for salsa lessons—it’s a dance with flavors.
  12. I installed a doorbell—it rings true.
  13. I wrote with a broken pencil—no point, but it felt sharp.
  14. I bought a map—it finally led me right.
  15. I polished my car—it gave me glossy confidence.

2. Short Double Entendre Jokes

Double Entendre Jokes hit fast and flirt harder—just enough spice to make you smirk, just enough wit to keep you thinking.

  1. I’m on a seafood diet—I see food and eat it.
  2. That math test was radical—it made me square.
  3. I tried dieting—but the scales tipped in my favor.
  4. My calendar’s full—it’s date night every night.
  5. I lost my umbrella—it was a cover story.
  6. My watch stopped—it needed a second chance.
  7. I boiled water—it vaporized my problems.
  8. My cat’s fur’s too long—it’s a purr-suasive look.
  9. I planted a tree—it grew on me.
  10. I opened a bakery—it kneaded the dough.
  11. My shoes squeak—they’re outstanding in their field.
  12. I joined the choir—it’s my vocal exercise.
  13. I dropped my phone—it had a hard fall.
  14. My lamp’s dim—it needs a bright future.
  15. I trimmed my hedge—it’s cutting-edge.

3. Top-Rated Double Entendre Jokes from Reddit 🧠

Reddit fans love wordplay that flirts with meaning. These got upvoted for clever twists. Expect smirks and snorts.

  1. “My printer’s jammed—it’s a sticky situation.”
  2. “I bought a ladder—I’m taking my career to new heights.”
  3. “My dentist says I have sweet teeth—it’s a sugarcoat.”
  4. “I opened a hair salon—it combs naturally.”
  5. “My bike got flat—it couldn’t handle my drive.”
  6. “I made a belt at work—it’s holding me together.”
  7. “I bought a corkscrew—it’s a real twist.”
  8. “The concert was electric—it struck a chord.”
  9. “My phone got grounded—it misbehaved.”
  10. “I dusted my blinds—they revealed themselves.”
  11. “My fish tank’s murky—it’s deep thought.”
  12. “I sharpened pencils—it was a pointed remark.”
  13. “My shoes needed polish—they found their sole.”
  14. “I filled the pool—it made a splash.”
  15. “My blinds fell—they got blindsided.”

4. One-Liner Style Double Entendre Jokes

Each line’s short, sharp, and sly. They land fast and stick. Great for social media posts.

  1. I got a new mattress—it supports me through thick and thin.
  2. My watch needs winding—it’s lost its spark.
  3. I sharpened my wit—it cuts deep.
  4. I bought curtains—they really draw a crowd.
  5. My fridge runs—it’s a bit cold.
  6. I planted bulbs—they light up my garden.
  7. My coffee’s strong—it keeps me grounded.
  8. I mixed cocktails—they stirred emotions.
  9. My wallet’s empty—it lacks substance.
  10. I cleaned windows—they gave me a clearer outlook.
  11. My book fell open—it revealed some cover stories.
  12. I reheated pizza—it was a cold case.
  13. My sweater’s cozy—it warms the heart.
  14. I assembled furniture—it held me together.
  15. My boat sank—it’s a deep issue.

5. Double Entendre Jokes for Mature Audiences 🍷

These jokes play with meanings that aren’t quite for kids. They’re witty, a little spicy, but never crude. Perfect for a laugh with friends who get the hint.

  1. I told her my garden was full of beds—she said I had quite the plot.
  2. The bartender said, “What’ll you have?” I said, “Something with a twist.”
  3. She asked if I liked her curves—I said they were well-rounded.
  4. My massage therapist has skilled hands—they really know how to press the issue.
  5. I’m reading a steamy novel—it’s got layers you can’t resist.
  6. I asked her if she was single—she said, “Depends on how you tie the knot.”
  7. The chef said the recipe was rich—it had depth and cream.
  8. He whispered, “Careful, I’m a handful.” I said, “Good, I like a challenge.”
  9. The party was heated—everyone was getting comfortable.
  10. I told her my bed was too soft—she said it needed some firmness.
  11. I dropped the ball on the date—it bounced back harder.
  12. I like my coffee dark and hot—just like my conversations.
  13. The massage felt electric—I was definitely charged up.
  14. We played footsie under the table—it was a real step forward.
  15. She winked and said, “Let’s not beat around the bush.”

6. Double Entendre Jokes Written in English 🇬🇧

Playing with the quirks of English makes double entendre jokes twice as fun. Idioms and slang add spice and surprise. It’s a word playground you’ll want to visit.

  1. I’m feeling a bit under the weather—but I’m just raining on your parade.
  2. The biscuit was hard—it really took the biscuit.
  3. He spilled the beans—they were a bit too saucy.
  4. I’m in a pickle—this situation’s quite the gherkin.
  5. She gave me a wink—it was cheeky as a fox.
  6. I’m all ears—ready to hear your yarns.
  7. That joke was daft—it went over my head.
  8. The kettle’s boiling—it’s about to spill the tea.
  9. I’m chuffed with my work—it’s the bee’s knees.
  10. The cat’s out of the bag—time to face the music.
  11. I’m over the moon—this news flew me sky high.
  12. The chips are down—it’s crunch time.
  13. He’s full of hot air—blowing smoke again.
  14. The wool’s pulled over my eyes—I’m feeling a bit sheepish.
  15. I’m knackered—need a cuppa to recharge.

7. Family-Friendly Double Entendre Humor 👨‍👩‍👧‍👦

Double Entendre Jokes

Safe for all ages, these jokes bring smiles without awkward moments. They’re clever but clean—perfect for family dinners or school lunches.

  1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
  2. I told my dog a joke—he pawsitively loved it.
  3. The pencil was sharp—it really pointed out the details.
  4. I planted some flowers—they really grew on me.
  5. The cookie went to school—it wanted to be a smart cookie.
  6. I bought a clock—it’s about time.
  7. The chair was tired—it needed a rest.
  8. The sandwich was on a roll—it couldn’t ketchup.
  9. The light bulb had a bright idea—it lit up the room.
  10. My math book is sad—it’s full of problems.
  11. The balloon was feeling up—it just wanted to rise.
  12. The cat took a nap—it was feline good.
  13. The blanket hugged me tight—it was a warm welcome.
  14. The drum got loud—it was beating around the bush.
  15. I told a joke at the zoo—it was a roaring success.

8. Conclusion: Best Picks of Double Entendre Jokes 🏆

These jokes are the cream of the crop. They blend cleverness, wit, and charm perfectly. You’re armed with humor that will brighten any room.

  1. I told my computer I needed a break—it said, “Ctrl yourself.”
  2. The tomato blushed—it saw the salad dressing.
  3. I asked the clock what time it was—it said, “Time to wind down.”
  4. The book fell for me—it was a novel experience.
  5. I wrote with a broken pencil—it had no point, but I kept going.
  6. The cookie crumbled—it was a sweet defeat.
  7. My chair is my favorite seat—it really supports me.
  8. The snowman waved—it was a cool gesture.
  9. I got a job at the bakery—it was a piece of cake.
  10. The phone’s ringing—it’s calling me out.
  11. The paint was dry—it was a colorful day.
  12. The river told me to go with the flow—it was sound advice.
  13. The candle lit up my life—it burned bright.
  14. The elevator was uplifting—it took me to new heights.
  15. The calendar says today’s a good day—it’s marked perfect.

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